Days Alone: 4
This past week has been a whirlwind to say the least.
So many people. Guys I kinda don't know what to do with myself because there are a lot of people. Like ya know, I'm quiet and reserved sometimes and its hard with all of these people. Anyway, the multiple introductions to the same person struggle is v real in my life right now. I thought I was good with names, but apparently I'm not.
So an update on what I have been doing:
So I got on campus last Friday for First Gen orientation. First Gen is anyone whose parents have not gone to a four year institution of higher learning. We, and the international kids, all get here before the entire class and get oriented. I mean I dunno, it was interesting, but I didn't really feel like I belonged. Most of the kids were either from New York or California, with a few other unimportant states scattered about. I couldn't really relate to the Californians and they all cliqued together anyway. I didn't really relate to the New Yorkers either. Most of them were from the city and when they asked were I was from and I said Westchester, I got the "Oh.....Westchester" look, if you know what I'm talking about. People were nice and stuff, but yeah no real prospects as far as friends go.
Being considered First Gen is really weird to me. Like my parents went to culinary school, so while technically they didn't go to college, they still got educated, they still have a trade. I have never though of myself as First Gen because of this. Also I feel like I don't have the traditional First Gen story. All the leaders of the program were students and at the beginning they all told us their stories, and some of them were really hard to hear. There were stories of abuse, immigration struggles, homelessness, controlling parents, etc. I don't have any of that. I went to a private boarding school, my parents are citizens, sure their divorce was messy and still is, but that is of no real burden to me, sure I live in a one bedroom apartment with my mom, but it is in a good neighborhood and my mom supports me and not the other way around. I just felt strange and like I didn't deserve to be there. I never have imagined my future with out the idea of going to college in it. It was just, like, the thing everybody does. I guess I have taken that for granted.
One highlight from my time in First Gen orientation was this conversation I had with one of the international students. It was with one of the most intelligent people I have met to date (Sorry Mr. Brooks); this dude from Shanghai. Both the First Gens and International students had all gone down to one of the fields for a big bonfire with s'mores and stuff. I was just loafing around, saying hi to people and introducing my self. The usual convos, name, where are you from, how are you liking it here, what classes are you going to be taking. I was taking to a bunch of people and then I some how found myself talking to this guy. He asked me what I was taking this fall and I said, "Intro to mechanics, Drawing 1, Multivariable Calc, and Borrowing and Stealing". He asked me to repeat the second one and from there on we went in to an amazing discussion of art, of the process of creating it, of the great masters and who is the greatest, modern vs classics. Then we went back to looking at the fire and we started talked about it as a piece of art, and the power of destruction, creation, and religions role in shaping our view of each of these things. Then somehow we started talking about what sports we do, which lead to a conversation about fencing, which lead to how one would actually fight in all that armor, which lead to how man's idea of beauty has changed over the years, which lead to a discussion on perfection and the power of flaws, hamartias, Shakespeare, language, the way in which how some one talks inform others opinions of them, and so on and so on. We talked for like three hours straight and it was so interesting I didn't even care. It was the first actual conversation I had with anyone that night. All I can say is guys we seriously need to real talk about philosophy more often. It was really cool and still is the highlight of my week.
After First Gen orientation the rest of the freshmen arrived, which was a little concerning because suddenly the campus was flooded with people. I have met all the people I'm living with and for the most part they seem okay. I am surprised how much certain people here, that I'm meeting now remind me of old friends from the hilltop. I keep finding little bit and pieces of all of you in others I'm meeting. I don't know if this is just because there is actually a lack of variation in the species or if it just me imagining in because I am missing everyone too much. I'm not even going to go into saying good bye to my mom.
In regards to the roommate situation, I am just not sure yet. I couldn't be here to greet her because of First Gen stuff, so I wrote her a note. When I came back her side was all set up and I met her and her family, but nothing more than hellos were exchanged. I haven't really spoken much to her even though two days have passed since. We are polite and let each other know when we are going somewhere, but we haven't really talked. I have tried to situate myself in ways that would allow us to socialize, but she has been aligning herself with other parties. We co-habitate fine I guess. It is just weird living with someone who you have never really had a conversation with.
College concerns still remain the same. Social stuff. School Stuff. Also thank you Kyla and a worrying alcohol awareness presentation/dorm convo for stiring up my worries about the party scene on campus and in my own supposedly dry dorm.
So far, so swell.
Sincerely,
Jordan
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